Worship at my desk

Honestly, I’ve been a bit overwhelmed these first two weeks of school. Late nights and naps are starting to pop into my daily line up again. As I crawled into bed last night Psalm 127:1b came to mind:

“It’s useless to rise early and go to bed late, and work your worried fingers to the bone. Don’t you know he enjoys giving rest to those he loves?”

It was after 1:30am, and I knew I’d need to be up at 7am for an 8am small group. (If you know me, you know 6 hours of sleep just isn’t enough). I felt the wear on my body – the tense muscles, the overworked brain, and anxious thoughts. As I curled into a ball in bed and bemoaned the beginnings of this nap/late night cycle all over again. I asked God to hold me and give me rest.

I woke up exhausted and realized I’d double booked a phone meeting with Avant over the bible study. Doh.

In a hard decision (sometimes we have to say ‘no’ to good things), I decided to set up a morning work schedule for the rest of the quarter. Taking advantage of my class schedule, which doesn’t have me at school till 11am Monday-Friday, I committed to being available for Avant in the early am. It’ll mean skipping the bible study, but it’d allow me to be a designer in the am, and a student the rest of the day.

Funny thing about setting boundaries – they give freedom. I had an incredible block of work this morning. I could rest in the fact I didn’t have to worry about reading/studies right now, I’d be free later in the day and could focus on design now. As it sometimes does, this morning just sitting at my desk pushing type and photos for a Tajikistan church plant proposal became a powerful worship experience.

As I headed to class at 11am, I felt grounded in purpose and eager to be with other students listening to the lecture and dialogue. It reinforced the role of worship to me again as primary, centering, and life giving. I don’t understand how or why design becomes a worship experience for me – I don’t know what that is for you … but man … if you can tap into that it’s a huge blessing!


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